Friday, April 18, 2014

Do not think at me like that

I have come across so many men, good well educated men who would go out of their way to help a woman in need, who take good care of their girl friends, sisters, mother.... and yet, yet they do not think twice about discussing a woman's anatomy in the basest of ways, just because she is a celebrity or a complete stranger who "is dressed provocatively" or voices her thoughts or is "aggressive"...

Is it wrong to appreciate beauty? Absolutely not. 
But is it wrong to objectify it? You better believe it. And it is not appreciated. At all.

Dear men,
When you look at me
And discuss my anatomy
With friends, with yourself
I hurt.

It makes me want to cringe and cover
and shy away.

You may say you are educated
and respect women
But really, think
Be honest with yourself first
Weren't you the one
Who laughed at the juicy ball joke?
Did I ask for it?
Like a violator would justify it by saying
Maybe I deserved it because I wore a tight t-shirt
Maybe I deserve it all.

It is time to wake up
And understand
I am not just an object
I am a person just like you
Yes I have a beautiful body
But I have a mind too

Don't look at me
and see flesh.
Look at me
and see me.


Simpleton said...

Hmm. I think I must have done this in someway sometime. Sorry.

But, tell me, if this happens towards women, does it not happen towards men too? Aren't there ever any discussions about a man's height, voice, colour, weight, gait? And don't these discussions take place amongst women too? Not just about men, but about other women?

I understand that its offensive at times, but is it always intended to be that way? Couldn't it just have been a discussion like that about pot holes, or inflation, or weather or a performance in a movie, which is discussed and forgotten?

I also understand that if someone revolts / retorts, the reaction should not be "but you called for it" but rather a simple "hey I didn't mean it that way. Sorry".

But the discussion by itself is harmless...


Tinky Toinkers said...

Didn't see this earlier.

Yes I agree, men are at the receiving end too. I have heard women discussing a man in the basest of manner as well, but just because it is done both ways, it does not become right.
Appreciating beauty, perfection is lovely. I would love it if someone walks up to me and says hey, looking nice today, I think this colour looks good on you or brilliant hair cut... but I will take offence if you forget my face is around 8 inches above my chest, if you leer at me, make snide remarks about the way I walk and generally behave like a bag of hormones.

Discussion by itself is harmless when it is meant to be harmless.